Be Consciously Selfless

"If you practice putting others before yourself willingly, knowing what you are doing, you are aligning yourself with the Power of the Universe and have all of Heaven to help you."

We are often faced with a choice in life where we are asked to align ourselves with the world that we see and the world of the unseen, that is the spiritual world or higher ideals.  The moments when this occur are very subtle and, if we miss them, we miss out on a chance to deepen our spiritual life.  Such moments usually have the following elements in common.  Some event in your life occurs or someone acts in such a way that infringes on your ego.  You feel that pang in your stomach, the one you feel when someone takes advantage of you.

The fundamental wisdom of this world is, in such cases, to right the wrong.  The advice goes along the lines of standing up for your rights, defending yourself, and wanting equal justice.  All of this advice plays upon the ego. Just as you have an ego, there are collective consciousnesses, large and small, that have egos as well.  Your family, friends, co-workers, even "religious" people may endorse you defending your ego or even their collective egos.  Instead of asserting your or their rights, see a time such as this as an ample opportunity to practice aligning yourself with the unseen, that still, small voice inside you that comes from a Power greater than yourself.

You see, such circumstances were put into your life for exactly that purpose.  To not do so is to miss a chance to grow spiritually and see things from a higher dimension.  Such advice flies in the face of the conventional wisdom of this world and you will be ridiculed as being weak, not having a backbone or caving to pressure.

The higher truth in this is that there are two types of selflessness.  The first type is always giving into other's demands unknowingly because you are weak.  The second, highest, type is practicing putting others before yourself willingly, knowing what you are doing and the sacrifice you are making.  This is quiet strength.  In doing this, you are aligning yourself with the Power of the Universe and have all of Heaven to help you.  In such a case, if someone takes advantage of you, they are taking advantage of the Power inside you.  They are building up negative karma for themselves which may have an immediate or delayed impact upon their lives.

Pay attention to circumstances in your life when you feel the need to assert your rights.  Ask yourself the question: "If I was looking at the situation from the outside, what would be the best decision for all involved?" instead of immediately jumping in and making decisions on behalf of your ego.  If necessary, ask an impartial friend who is able to weigh the matter justly what a fair course of action is.

An even higher course of action is to turn the table on these circumstances and use them as a chance to befriend your adversary or share love with others.  In this manner, the arrows that come at you in life turn into flowers and fall harmlessly at your feet.  Others instantly know on some level when another is taking a higher ground in a matter and respect them.  How can someone want to hurt another who is smiling, with outstretched arms?  They will not, or, if they do, it will be apparent to others what is going on.  They will come to your aid in one way or another.

A simple truth is that any war that has ever occurred happened because someone refused to put down their weapon.  It is impossible for there to be a battle if the other party is disarmed.  No one can fight with you if you refuse to fight back.

Of course, there are times when you must, out of self-respect, stand up for yourself and, to not do so, will obviously inflict irreparable harm upon yourself or others.  In such cases, by all means, do what is necessary to make sure that such harm is not inflicted.  However, your first concern should be taking an altruistic view of the situation and associated action.  There is a benefit to invoking the Power of the Universe in such matters.  You can rest easy knowing that God is going before you, coordinating events, opening doors and bestowing such blessings upon you that you are not able to imagine.  When you invoke the Unseen, the seeming "power" that you gave away will come back to you in ten- or a hundred-fold as you reap these heavenly rewards.

Be Kind to Yourself, Part 2

"Your weaknesses are perfect parts of you that balance you out and make you into a complete, whole Being."

How you view the world is a direct reflection of your internal state, the way you view yourself, your beliefs, what you consider your advantages and shortcomings.  It is so easy to lose sight of this.  Our perception of reality is so inherently biased that it cannot even really be called "reality" by another person.  It is when we perceive our "reality" as the one true reality that big problems begin to arise, but that is the topic for another time.  We should always be mindful that we subjectively view people, situations and things in our life through a distorted lens.  People and things are not bad or good, but only when we label them as such.

There is not a single person who views their actions as not being motivated by "good" yet we may label them otherwise.  Who is right?  In truth, there is no right as seeking such an answer is to say there is a wrong way to live in this world.  We are all on a path and are in different states of spiritual evolution.  Each state is not better than the other yet it is just different and we are to love and respect all in the way in which they live their life.

You can use how you view others as a tool to go deeper into yourself.  If someone is late to meet you and then explains to you a genuine story why and profusely apologizes, you will accept their apology.  If someone wrongs you in some way, yet genuinely apologizes, you will forgive them.  Yet, when it comes to ourselves, we have such a different standard.  If you are late, you beat yourself up the entire time for why you are running late and feel guilty about it.  If you wrong someone, you endlessly relive the moment and try to change the past in your mind.  Treat yourself with as much love and kindness as you treat others.  You are to see yourself as God sees you, which is perfect.

Just as you are to look at the world with a lens of Love, you are to look at yourself with that same Everlasting Love.  You are a Loving, Eternal Being, full of compassion and goodness.  What does it mean to look at yourself through a lens of Love?  You are literally only able to see light, your good qualities and attributes.  It is not to say that you are blinded to anything negative but that that negative becomes a positive when looking at it in this way.  When looking at a weakness, you give yourself the benefit of the doubt as to why you have it, and you are so enamored with love for yourself that you literally see it as a strength.  Maybe there is a corresponding strength that gives rise to the weakness.  Maybe this weakness has brought situations into your life for the good.  Yet, the more that we focus on this weakness through the eyes of Love, we see it as perfected.  Your weaknesses are perfect parts of you that balance you out and make you into a complete, whole Being.  Pour love into your weaknesses.

I think it is important to note that, when looking at yourself, do not see the past or the future.  Feeling good or bad about past events is taking you away from yourself.  It is true that the past can give you clues as to your tendencies, and that is fine.  However, do not focus on specific things that happened.  They are over and done with.

For example, I have a tendency to be late to things.  This, in itself, is not a weakness, just an observation.  Being late is certainly rooted in a point in time and is focused on the past or future.  A better way to interpret this is that I tend to optimistically view things as taking less time than they actually take.  At the same time, I tend to focus more on myself, what I need to do, then how I make others feel when they are waiting for me.  So, the root is ego-based as most weaknesses are.  My associated strengths are that I am very optimistic and am more people or event-driven than time-driven.  I give myself the benefit of the doubt in that I am so focused on what is before me, I lose sight that I am disrespecting others in being late.  I see this weakness as perfected in that it is a necessary part of me that makes me who I am.  I love this weakness, accept myself just the way that I am because of it, and do not wish to change it.

The general principle is to see yourself as a whole person and have utmost compassion for yourself.  As you long to be in a relationship with a lover that loves you passionately and unconditionally, you must too love yourself.  Be in love with yourself.  It is only when you truly love yourself that you can love another.  As your internal view of yourself begins to shift, you will see that your outward perspective will shift as well.  You will have more compassion for others and will be a light that others will see and gravitate towards.

Be Kind to Yourself, Part 1

"Radiate love from the depth of your being and allow that love to transform your mind, eventually spilling out and radiating love to others through your actions."

If you do not have control of your mind, then you are like a ship at sea, tossed by waves and storms.  Life is a seeming chaotic place to live, as you are at the whim of what happens to you.  This is because our minds are reactive to our environment; they blow things out of proportion and focus on the minutia rather than the important things.  The fact that your mind, body and emotions are not You is an important teaching.  Once you learn to love and observe your mind, then the knot begins to unravel.  The power of the mind is when we consider the mind as us.  That is the illusion and is the lie we have bought.

The worst poison in this life, which may even be the hell that we have heard about, is when we are a slave to our mind.  Worse still is when our minds play back tapes of failures in our life, how worthless we are, or how we cannot do this or that.  If we are to believe in sins, this is one of the worst sins of all.  This can truly destroy us.  The danger about being a slave to your mind and that your mind is replaying negative thoughts is that this causes your emotions to spiral downward, with no way of escape.  Even the thought "why am I being so hard on myself" results in a negative emotional spike.

We should have compassion for people who are cold or indifferent to others.  These people may have the worst attitudes, are critical or judgmental of others and are simply unpleasant to be around.  These same people are even harder on themselves.  This is part of the karma of acting on negative emotions or thoughts.  As humans, we are unable to treat others differently from the way we treat ourselves.

Where is the way out?  The way out of this state is to realize that you are not your mind, your body or your emotions.  This is the first step.  This creates a buffer around your life, so you are not instantly reacting to things.  You begin to think "this is interesting; I ran out of money" instead of instantly trying to come up with a hundred plans to manipulate life to give you more money.  You give space to life and allow things to happen to you.  The second step is learning to be an observer of your thoughts.  You do not interject commentaries into your thought stream but just observe it, thinking "this is interesting."

What begins to happen is you will begin to have lapses of thought where you almost get the feeling of radiant light breaking through, a light filled with peace and love.  This is when there is a break in the mind stream.  The third step is learning to love your mind.  You are to love your mind as a child, as a friend, as a very necessary part of you that is your ally.  If you treat your mind as something foreign or "bad", it will react in this way to you.  The fourth and final step to break free of this bondage is to begin to fill your mind with positive, uplifting things.  Meditate on the many blessings in your life, express gratitude for everything that has been given to you, be joyful.

These steps do not have to be taken in order.  Each one is in fact not independent of each other.  They all can be summed up in the following statements.  Love yourself with as much love as you love others.  Give as much grace to yourself as you give to others.  Give yourself the benefit of the doubt.  Maybe you are doing the best that you can considering the circumstances.  Learn what you can, at the time, when you could have done something better, then let it go.  In short, radiate love from the depth of your being and allow that love to transform your mind, eventually spilling out and radiating love to others through your actions.

In the next part, I will write about ways that you can be kinder to yourself, in general.

The Pursuit of Happiness

"What gives us meaning and purpose in our lives is the journey towards God, the source of all happiness, simultaneously realizing that there is no where to go as we are already there."

There is a seeming paradox in one's purpose for life.  If your purpose is to find happiness for yourself, then that is primarily a self-serving goal.  There is nothing wrong with being happy and everyone deserves to be happy.  Where does the paradox lie?  It is impossible to find happiness by pursuing happiness as outside oneself.  It is only when you let go of the pursuit that happiness comes.  This is because happiness outside yourself is attached to other things that are transient.  You have to dig deeper than self to get to your true Self.  You know you are truly centered when your focus is not on the end result of happiness but on helping others find happiness.

You discover that being happy is part of your True Nature.  You do not have to do anything to be happy; you are Happiness.  Serving others and helping them along on their path is a natural extension of the Joy that arises from within.  What gives us meaning and purpose in our lives is the journey towards God, the source of all happiness, simultaneously realizing that there is no where to go as we are already there.  God is here in this present moment.  The mistake is to think that there is a destination to get to.  There isn't.  The secret is to be with this Truth.  This Truth is that God is present as we strive towards her;  God is in the journey, not in the destination.

So, back to your purpose for life.  In truth, there is no paradox as long as we speak of things in the correct context.  A life built for pursuing Happiness that feeds your soul is one and the same as a life that seeks after God.  There is only one Good in the Universe and that is God.  God alone can provide the only nourishment for your Soul.  A mistake is seeking after happiness attached to temporal objects in this world.  In this plane of existence, such happiness is short-lived as you will eventually encounter its opposite, the associated sadness when that object disappears or changes.  Do what you wish to be happy, without attachment and without expectation of any result.  Follow your soul-inspired dreams and be filled with the everlasting Happiness from God.

Love and Respect Others

"We live in a wonderfully good, compassionate Universe and have a patient God who waits for us to blossom like a flower as we realize eternal Truths."

You should see all people as having a spark of the Divine in them.  At the same time, you are connected to others as we are all One.  Many teaching stem from this truth.  Treating others the way you would like to be treated.  Loving your enemies.  Forgiving others.  This is because there is no difference between yourself and others.  If you are kind to someone, you are being kind to yourself.  If you are cruel to someone, you are being cruel to yourself.  This is not figurative language.  You are literally hurting yourself on many levels by thinking you are a separate Being from others.

There are many levels to this truth.  There is the notion of karma in that positive and negative actions will come back to you in some form in this life.  There is a physical reality in that you store up toxins and disease in your body if you harbor ill feelings for others or mistreat others.  Also, you are the co-creator of your own reality.  If you treat others with love and respect, you are co-creating that reality for yourself.  You will attract events, circumstances and people that vibrate with that higher level of energy.

The negative you see in others is a projection of yourself, your fears and weaknesses.  You can quickly begin to see that your reality is exactly as you make it.  Others are truly an extension of yourself.

The hallmark of spirituality is compassion.  Yet, why do you see so many people trying to convert or proselytize others into their way of thinking?  This very action goes against that which they are trying to promote, if that indeed is a spiritual way of living.  Each person is on their own path and should be following it of their own volition.  If we just realized that all paths lead to the same Ultimate Truth, then we would realize that there is no need for converting others.

People will be attracted to a higher vibrational energy because it matches their own.  This will happen naturally in the soul's natural course of evolution.  Our mission in life should be generosity, service and compassion without expectation of getting anything in return.  At the same time, if others approach you and ask you about your philosophy on life or spirituality, that is entirely different.  In that case, you are to freely explain whatever they would like to hear.

At the same time, in seeming paradox to the previous discussion, there is no where to get to.  You are already there.  It is the realization of who You are that takes some time.  But there is no rush.  We live in a wonderfully good, compassionate Universe and have a patient God who waits for us to blossom like a flower as we realize these eternal Truths.

Be an Alchemist in Life

"We can change any life circumstance into supreme goodness if we realize that every circumstance is perfect in and of itself."

Good and bad are just labels that we assign to things.  Rather than label, we should just look at the object or circumstance without judgment.  As soon as we judge, we stop discussion and internal dialog about it, which blinds us to reality.  In fact, good and bad are the yin and yang of our earthly existence.  They are necessary and complimentary of each other in this world.

The place where we want to get to is a place where there are no opposites.  Our hope and our faith is in our Higher Power, where there is only supreme goodness, happiness and joy.  In a word, Love.  How do we get there?

We drop judgment and drop labeling.  We let things be as they are.  We learn to hold both the "good" and "bad" in our Being simultaneously.  There is no conflict, because the good and the bad are illusions of this world.  If we label something good and truly experience it as such, we are guaranteed to experience the bad.  If we place our happiness on a form, we are guaranteed to experience the associated sadness.  This is because every form is temporary and will disappear someday.  We came into this world naked and will leave naked.  Our happiness comes from the Formless, which is an eternal, unchanging source of Joy.

We need to stop seeing good or bad as outside ourselves.  Inside us, there is only goodness, happiness and Love.  We need to see the world from the inside out.  Look at life through a lens of Love.

We need to learn how to be alchemists.  We can change any life circumstance into supreme goodness if we realize that every circumstance is perfect in and of itself.  It is only our limited human perspective that makes us label something as bad.

We should all be learners in every situation.  See things for what they are, beyond the labels.  Everything in life is cause and effect.  We do not think about making lemonade when life gives us lemons because we are so busy feeling "bad" about the lemons that life gave us.  Being a learner means being open to things outside ourself influencing our thoughts, perceptions and emotions.  If we learn the lessons that life gives us, we break the cycle of our own habits and progress to the next stage.  In short, our spiritual evolution can progress if we are open to change.  All of this is only possible if we are viewing life through our lens of Love.

Let Go of Guilt and Worry

"Guilt means I am holding onto the past; worry means I want to control the future. Both show that I am not living in the present moment."

Many emotions that we feel, we have direct control over. It is so easy to feel like a "victim" in life. We all act like victims of our circumstance. The truth is we can instantly change many of our emotions with the force of will. It is only our unbelief, our lack of faith, that makes us feel enslaved to every emotion. We need to see ourselves as separate from our body, mind and emotions.

If we do this, we can see that we can observe the emotions much more easily, and, consequently, understand why we feel a certain way. Understanding takes power away from the emotions. We see that we feel a certain way in a certain situation and take note of it. We, then, are better prepared to handle that situation in the future. For example, I may feel guilty about spending money on myself to buy some new pants. However, the pants may be necessary to hold down a job and the guilt is misplaced.

Guilt, when felt genuinely for a legitimate situation where I have wronged others or myself, should be taken seriously directly after the offense. Thereafter, feelings of guilt are a way for me to feel enslaved to that moment in time. Similarly, worry felt for a loved one may be a clue to us that immediate action is needed. Take that action, yet do not hold onto the worry.

Guilt means I am holding onto the past; worry means I want to control the future. Both show that I am not living in the present moment. For the most part, negative emotions are a slave to the ego. The ego does not want to live in the present moment. In the present moment, the ego dissolves away as we are then truly in the presence of God or Self. By a force of will, let go of guilt, let go of worry. They do us no good but serve only to rob us of living our lives. They keep us enslaved to the past and the future, two imaginary domains of the ego.

When else can we live our lives but in the present moment? There is no other time to live so we must drop our imaginary shackles and embrace the freedom that is ours in the here and now.